Temporal War Crimes and the Pre/Post Cognition Wars.
Good evening, my few, my proud beloved bastards. Doktor Bedlam here, as you might expect. Despite my absences, I have not, in fact, been murdered by my adoring fans. Nor have I been arrested for war crimes, yet.
Which is a nice little segue into discussing todays topic; Temporal War Crimes, and the Pre/Post Cognition Wars.
Back in 2041, and forward in 1976, temporal examination became disturbingly confused, due in part to an excess of Postcognitives and Precognitives in each of the timelines. One would often attempt to look to the past, or future, even within the confines of ones own mind, and suddenly discover that they were, in fact, looking at the back of their own head from 5 minutes ago. Needless to say, this annoyed a great amount of people, who were casually minding their own business. Some time later, the aforementioned annoyed people, were very professionally minding the business of the pre- and post-cognitives. Often with chainsaws, shotguns, and a disturbingly large amount of prejudice.
Entire timelines were wiped out by the mobs, courtesy of 2923′s laxity in licensing time-travel devices, and eventually, 90% of the Temporal Spaces in which precognition and postcognition were possible were annhilated. And not before time, if you pardon the pun.
Even if you don’t, you had better. I have not been allowed to commit extreme violence for hours now, and I have this new Electro-saw to test out.
Anyhow, my synthetically sinful sweetlings, it turned out that the Giant Bastards Who Run Everything disapproved of the loss of revenue from the 90% of Temporal Spaces that were eliminated, and thus wielding the mighty powers of large armies with larger weaponry, they put an end to the foolishness with extreme professional prejudice. And then declared that even contemplating time-travel would be considered a War Crime, and punished to the full measure.
This story petered out, I know, but frankly, given the delicate nature of Time, and the fact that I do not wish to be prosecuted just yet, (their guns are still bigger than mine. Quite annoysome), you will have to sit there and suffer.
But do not contemplate timetravel. Even for Science. Because I will not come to your assistance when they shoot you repeatedly in the genitals. Oh no. I will simply laugh.
Yours, in good faith,
Doktor Bedlam.
